When I wrote recently about the
strange phenomenon of Facebook’s popularity with the self-absorbed (Why
Narcissists Love Facebook), not even I could have guessed the
apparent scope of the eye-popping stupidity and utter lack of judgement that
some Facebook users are actually capable of openly demonstrating. And because
it came as it did, they turned me for a punching bag.
Before you start condemning me,
and calling me stupid, clueless, or narcissistic, here is a point. Most young
people post photos on Instagram or Facebook to show off, or to fit in.
Remember, those who fit in have no idea of their own, no wonder they do what
others do. They have weak minds, non interesting ideas, and to say the least,
boring by nature and body language, never dream, believe Facebook serves them
right, and in many cases, are nauseating dependants on friends, parents, and acquaintances.
When disaster happens, signature
feature of the live television news coverage will be the sea of bystanders with
arms raised capturing countless images of violence, arson and looting via their
cell phone cameras. When an accident
occurs, someone chucks out a Smartphone first before thinking of first aid.
When children drowned in Mombasa, swimmers left for their phones to capture how
the parents were crying.
Remember the other day when you
were in hospital, your so called friends took more photos with you than they
contributed to your accumulating bill. And on their wall, I read something
like, “We are with you bro, quick recovery”. Really??
When a relation passed on the
other day, you realized that the people who made it to the funeral are those
you call acquaintances, and not those who help you burn your cash. I hope you
learnt who is a friend.
When Jadudi and Ezra were
calling for donations, all that these Facebookers did was to post photos, “Pamoja
na Jadudi”, and never contributed even 10 bob. But this post was overshadowed
by numerous posts of their not so curvy bodies; make up-ed faces, exposed breasts,
borrowed shoes, and photos in peoples’ homes, or courtesy coffee dates from
serious Friends.
Nowadays, before one eats at
the InterContinental, on a sponsorship of an NGO training you on
contraceptives, they snap the food first. They never pray as the case should
be. When they go home, and get their brother’s new car, they post, “My coolest
new ride”. And that is the person who owes you sh. 100. When they visit their
uncle’s place in Ridgeways, and the Aunt who stays in South C, they take photos
beside his 44 inch wall screen, or her beautifully landscaped lawn and post, “Home
sweet home”. And that is the girl who doesn’t want to go to her Shamakhokho
home.
Lately, campus students attend
free events to take photos with the Dj, Squeeze at a table with empty bottles
of liquor and say, “Kupatia mwili pole”. Posts of house parties, whose budget they have
no idea of form part of their posts. Worse still, if you want to impress and
win average campus girls, post photos of a photo with a celebrity anchor,
musicians or comedian, and caption it, “With my best pal, Octopizzo” And to awe
the wannabe expensive girl, just show the photos while at the airport when you
went to receive a relation, and caption, “back from a two week business trip in
Dubai”.
Apparently, those who post so
much do very little in their lives. They will get worried when they see their
friends posting photos in Malaysia, where they were on holiday. They have snide
thoughts when they learn of your wedding, and say, “Huyo dem alipenda pesa tu,
hakuna mapenzi hapo”. And if for any case things went bad somewhere, she will
say, “Wish you the best” when the fact is, she is saying, may it break soon.
These facebookers have never been more evil.
There’s
a direct link between the number of friends you have on Facebook and the degree
to which you qualify as a “socially disruptive” narcissist. Just for the
record, in a previous 2010 study on college students, narcissism was explained
as “a pervasive pattern of grandiosity, need for admiration and an exaggerated
sense of self-importance.”
Study
participants who scored highly on something called the Narcissistic Personality
Inventory questionnaire apparently had more friends on Facebook, tagged themselves
more often, and updated their status and profile pictures more frequently. The
research comes amid “increasing evidence that self-absorbed young people are
becoming increasingly obsessed with self-image and shallow friendships.” I’m just saying . . .
A number
of previous studies have linked narcissism with Facebook use, but, as reported
in The Guardian: “This study shows some of the first evidence of a direct
relationship between Facebook friends and the most toxic elements of
narcissistic personality disorder.”
Please
note, before you start sputtering off defensive responses: remember that all
Facebookers are narcissists, but merely that those with narcissistic tendencies
really, really love Facebook. So do people who need to tell the world what they
just ordered at Starbucks.
THE WRITER IS AN ACTUARY, SPEAKER
AND LIFE ENTHUSIAST
No comments:
Post a Comment